I cry....
because I don’t know what to do to properly remember you on your upcoming birthday (May 19th)
because I fear that once Squatter is here others might forget you
because I miss my first born
because I never got to feel you kick
because I remember the awful week in the hospital and the look in hubby’s eyes
because I miss you
I think about Gavin every day and I would like to do something to remember him on his birthday. Everytime I try to talk about him or what to do I start crying. Any thoughts or suggestions are welcome to help me with what to do.
Hugs. You'll never forget him.
ReplyDeleteDo you read Finding My New Normal? http://findmynewnormal.blogspot.com/2012/04/please-baby-please.html
She celebrated her angel son's first birthday by releasing a balloon and asking friends and family to launch balloons where they were too. Everyone took photos of the balloons and sent them to her. It was really lovely to see all the balloons drifting away into the sky toward her angel.
The post with the balloons was last August or so I think.
May 19th is my birthday too - I will remember your sweet Gavin that day.
ReplyDeleteI love the balloon idea, but you could also think about planting a tree or garden? It will be something you can nurture and watch grow?
ReplyDeleteI hope you find something that adequately celebrates your love for him!
(hugs). I don't know how close you are to family, but on Isaac's birthday we had our families over for dinner. It was good to just all be together and remember him. We also asked them to bring a gift they would typically by for a one year old that we donated to the children's hospital where Isaac was born.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you are missing Gavin. Maybe you could have a star named after him or just spend time with your family remembering Gavin. I really like the balloon and planting a tree idea too.
ReplyDelete((HUGS)) I love the ideas that the other ladies have put forth, especially the balloon.
ReplyDeleteSending you love... I know whatever you do to commemorate little Gavin, that it will be a special time. You're such an amazing mama.
ReplyDeleteI like the balloons and planting a tree/garden idea too. Especially the tree idea. That way, once baby Squatter comes, every year on Gavin's bday, you can tie a ribbon to the tree, and when the tree gets really big, you can sit underneath it with Squatter and remember Gavin together as a family.
ReplyDeleteYou can also buy butterflies and release them on his birthday.
Whatever you do, please let us know what we can do to help you remember him. ((Hugs))
Recently I was just at a fine dining restaurant where you could take home the menu. The menu was printed on seed paper. You can tear it up and plant it in a pot. Maybe you can get some memorial cards printed and give them to your family and close friends as a remembrance. This is the website where you can get the instructions and where you can get the cards:
ReplyDeletewww.botanicalpaperworks.com
Your blogs was one of the first ones I had found when beginning my journey and starting my own. I thought you were so brave for letting this community in on your life and story. A special thought and prayer to Gavin on the 19th and a big hug to you.
I am so sorry. I am sure that this month is very very hard for you & your family. I will think of your sweet boy on the 19th. I am sure whatever you do to honor him will be just perfect.
ReplyDelete(*hugs*) I like the idea of planting something, I did that after each of my miscarriages. What about a picnic, or something nice, in honor of him.
ReplyDeletei can't imagine what you must be feeling, but my heart goes out to you. i like the balloon idea - it's what i was going to suggest. you could even write a letter to gavin and send it up in the balloon. writing him a letter may help you to sort out your emotions, and, of course, i know he'll know what you wrote. i believe with every fiber of my being that he is with you, that he knows and loves you and his daddy and his little sister. regardless of how long he was with you here on earth, he will always be your son and, therefore, can never be forgotten. you're in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteOh hon. I know all of those feelings and I had a good cry tonight over M & A. I am so grateful to be pregnant again but it won't take away the memories or the heartache of our first loved.
ReplyDeleteI agree that writing a letter to gavin would be a great way to reach out to him. You could dedicate/buy a star for him (I plan on doing this). You could make him a quilt or a memory book of everything you have for him. You could do a memorial garden in his memory or do a candle lighting ceremony with your family.
I know it's overwhelming but it feels so good to do these things for your baby. I'm just sorry you (we) have to be celebrating those children without them by our sides.
May 19 is also my birthday - I will say a special prayer that day for your Gavin. I also like the balloon idea and also like the dedication of a star in his name as well.
ReplyDeleteSending love and thinking of you and Gavin.
ReplyDeleteSending so much love your way. xo
ReplyDeleteThoughts and prayers to you and Gavin.
ReplyDelete