Thursday, June 17, 2010

Sad Day

Today is the third anniversary of my mother in laws passing. It’s a sad day for the family. We always meet for dinner to remember her. We had started TTC a couple months before we found out she was sick. During the six months she was battling cancer we were desperately trying to conceive so we could tell her that she was going to be a grandma – we failed. Three years later I still feel like such a failure. A baby would bring such joy to my hubby’s family. They need something happy to happen soon and I hope I am the one to bring a bit of joy in their lives. You should have seen how happy my F-in-L was last summer when we told him I was pregnant. Granted, I miscarried at 10 weeks but for a few short weeks I gave them a great gift…a gift of a happy future and a bit of hope.

I know that a baby won’t “fix” anything and that is not my expectation. I just want to help bring some joy into everyone’s life! Especially ours!

7 comments:

  1. sending you hugs!! i totally get how you want to give your inlaws good news. we're the same way. dh's parents had him and his sister super late, so now they are in their 80's and we are DESPERATE to tell them we are pregnant. his mom calls us everyday to remind us to have sex (bc sex = babies) and while it drives us crazy, we also can't wait until we're able to tell them they're having more grandchildren!

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  2. I know that same feeling. I remember telling our families after our first pregnancy. The joy felt was undescribable!
    I pray that we both get to share that joy with our families again very soon. And THIS time it never goes away.
    So very sorry for the loss in your family. You are all in my prayers on this day of rememberance.

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  3. Wow, I am so sorry. I can't imagine how painful this anniversary is for your family. Thinking of all of you on this very difficult day and sending you lots of hugs.

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  4. Thanks for the congrats....and Im sorry abt your mother n law.....Its great that you get together with his family each year and honor her memory:) Someday you will be able to look up into the sky and tell her she is going to be a grandma:)

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  5. These types of anniversaries are always hard. I'm sorry for your loss. A baby always brings joy to the world. I hope you will have the opportunity to bring joy to your extended family soon. :)

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  6. Thanks for following me. It looks like the past couple of months have definitely sucked for both of us. I completely understand that failure feeling...so not fair.
    Wishing you the best with this stupid, stupid IF stuff!!!!

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